
Week 1 is in the books! Lots of great and not so great football.
And there are some early story lines beginning to emerge. After a three day rotating party between the Doofus Deck and Ellis’ crib I’m adjusting my football portfolio by
Selling Shares
Purdue – the Boilers were awful in losing to Cincinnati. Down 14-7 at the half Purdue quickly circled the drain in the second half – coughing the ball up 4 times in an ugly 42-7 loss. I thought Cincinnat would take a step back under Tommy Tuberville but apparently not. I’ll be keeping an eye out to see if it was a turnover fluke for both teams or the beginning of a trend.
Nebraska – Nebraska’s defense ended last year giving up 70 points to Wisconsin and 45 to Georgia to end up the season. This offseason was supposed to plug the holes. Not so fast – a mid level MWC team, Wyoming put up over 600 yards of offense on the Black Shirts. Nebraska still got the got the win 37-34 but unless the screws are tightened start fading Nebraska or at least take the over.
Central Michigan - I’ve never been a fan of head coaches who got their jobs mainly because they were good recruiting coordinators. Chip HC Dan Enos backed away from the hot seat just a bit last year by ending the season winning 4 of his last 5. Looks like he is headed back to the bun toaster after a dismal 59-9 loss to Michigan. Losing QB Cody Kater and RB Zurlon Tipton won’t help Enos’ cause.
West Virginia – The Neers started out last season winning their first 5 games and being ranked number 8. Then the wheels fell off as the competition got better. Dana Holgorsen’s squad lost their next 5 on the way to a 7-6 season. Now they almost stumbled against a 1AA team beating William& Mary 14-7. The loss of QB Geno Smith put the Moutaineers in a rebuilding mode. Looks like there is a long way to go.
Georgia – against top tier competition. The Mutts kept woofing about how they were 10 yards away from playing for all the marbles last year. They forgot to mention that Aaron Murray was 1-5 against top 10 teams. Make that 1-6 as Clemson knocked off Georgia 38-35 in a thriller on Saturday. Next up is number 6 South Carolina. Uh Oh
Oregon State – The Beavers were supposed to be a balanced well coached team that was going to linger around in the rankings. But their defense was destroyed against a top tier 1AA team in Eastern Washington losing 49-46. It marks the second time in three years that Oregon State started out the season losing to a 1AA squad – they finished that season 3-9 Yikes.
Connecticut – I’ve been shorting HC Paul Pasqualoni ever since he took the position in Storrs. He is just not that good a head coach. Now it’s become obvious to the world after a miserable loss to 1AA Towson. The Huskies D used to have a solid defense but Towson ripped them for nearly 400 yards. If it weren’t for the Big Al rule I
would be betting heavily against the Huskies this year.
South Florida – McNeese State is a good 1AA program but c’mon USF – you let up 53 points? The Bulls may have underperformed under Skippy Holtz but new HC Wiliie Taggert appears to have taken it down another notch. Now, if Michigan State can’t score against a team that let up 424 yards to a 1AA school – they have real problems.
Buying Shares –
Oklahoma – The Sooners have been all offense for the last several years but it was the defense that ruled the day Saturday. This time last year UL Monroe was upsetting Arkansas and taking Auburn into OT. They are a solid (and a Doofus favorite) mid major. But the Oklahoma defense was able to hold the Warhawks to 9 first downs and 166 total yards. Impressive
Oklahoma State – The Cowboys are also noted for their offense with defense being an after thought. But just like the in state rivals – it was defense that ruled the day. Okie State stuffed the ground and pound Mississippi State offense holding them to 111 yards rushing and 3 points.
Washington - Huskie QB Keith Price torched the perennial BCS buster candidate Boise State for 324 passing yards and 3 TDs. Washington’s defense made stops when needed as the held the Broncos to 2 FGs.
Florida State – Jameis Winston – wow just plain wow. The true freshman QB was spectacular in destroying Pitt. Winston went 25 for 27 passing with the 2 misses being on target but the WR stepped out of bounds. He threw for 354 yards and 4 TDs. Johnny Football now has competition for the Heisman.
And when all the games were done, the cigar ashes thrown out and the empty booze bottles recycled - the Doofus had a small smile come across his face. I got the 2013 campaign off to a winning start going 2-1 as
And there are some early story lines beginning to emerge. After a three day rotating party between the Doofus Deck and Ellis’ crib I’m adjusting my football portfolio by
Selling Shares
Purdue – the Boilers were awful in losing to Cincinnati. Down 14-7 at the half Purdue quickly circled the drain in the second half – coughing the ball up 4 times in an ugly 42-7 loss. I thought Cincinnat would take a step back under Tommy Tuberville but apparently not. I’ll be keeping an eye out to see if it was a turnover fluke for both teams or the beginning of a trend.
Nebraska – Nebraska’s defense ended last year giving up 70 points to Wisconsin and 45 to Georgia to end up the season. This offseason was supposed to plug the holes. Not so fast – a mid level MWC team, Wyoming put up over 600 yards of offense on the Black Shirts. Nebraska still got the got the win 37-34 but unless the screws are tightened start fading Nebraska or at least take the over.
Central Michigan - I’ve never been a fan of head coaches who got their jobs mainly because they were good recruiting coordinators. Chip HC Dan Enos backed away from the hot seat just a bit last year by ending the season winning 4 of his last 5. Looks like he is headed back to the bun toaster after a dismal 59-9 loss to Michigan. Losing QB Cody Kater and RB Zurlon Tipton won’t help Enos’ cause.
West Virginia – The Neers started out last season winning their first 5 games and being ranked number 8. Then the wheels fell off as the competition got better. Dana Holgorsen’s squad lost their next 5 on the way to a 7-6 season. Now they almost stumbled against a 1AA team beating William& Mary 14-7. The loss of QB Geno Smith put the Moutaineers in a rebuilding mode. Looks like there is a long way to go.
Georgia – against top tier competition. The Mutts kept woofing about how they were 10 yards away from playing for all the marbles last year. They forgot to mention that Aaron Murray was 1-5 against top 10 teams. Make that 1-6 as Clemson knocked off Georgia 38-35 in a thriller on Saturday. Next up is number 6 South Carolina. Uh Oh
Oregon State – The Beavers were supposed to be a balanced well coached team that was going to linger around in the rankings. But their defense was destroyed against a top tier 1AA team in Eastern Washington losing 49-46. It marks the second time in three years that Oregon State started out the season losing to a 1AA squad – they finished that season 3-9 Yikes.
Connecticut – I’ve been shorting HC Paul Pasqualoni ever since he took the position in Storrs. He is just not that good a head coach. Now it’s become obvious to the world after a miserable loss to 1AA Towson. The Huskies D used to have a solid defense but Towson ripped them for nearly 400 yards. If it weren’t for the Big Al rule I
would be betting heavily against the Huskies this year.
South Florida – McNeese State is a good 1AA program but c’mon USF – you let up 53 points? The Bulls may have underperformed under Skippy Holtz but new HC Wiliie Taggert appears to have taken it down another notch. Now, if Michigan State can’t score against a team that let up 424 yards to a 1AA school – they have real problems.
Buying Shares –
Oklahoma – The Sooners have been all offense for the last several years but it was the defense that ruled the day Saturday. This time last year UL Monroe was upsetting Arkansas and taking Auburn into OT. They are a solid (and a Doofus favorite) mid major. But the Oklahoma defense was able to hold the Warhawks to 9 first downs and 166 total yards. Impressive
Oklahoma State – The Cowboys are also noted for their offense with defense being an after thought. But just like the in state rivals – it was defense that ruled the day. Okie State stuffed the ground and pound Mississippi State offense holding them to 111 yards rushing and 3 points.
Washington - Huskie QB Keith Price torched the perennial BCS buster candidate Boise State for 324 passing yards and 3 TDs. Washington’s defense made stops when needed as the held the Broncos to 2 FGs.
Florida State – Jameis Winston – wow just plain wow. The true freshman QB was spectacular in destroying Pitt. Winston went 25 for 27 passing with the 2 misses being on target but the WR stepped out of bounds. He threw for 354 yards and 4 TDs. Johnny Football now has competition for the Heisman.
And when all the games were done, the cigar ashes thrown out and the empty booze bottles recycled - the Doofus had a small smile come across his face. I got the 2013 campaign off to a winning start going 2-1 as

Week 1 Recap
BYU -1.5 @ Virginia – BYU scored a TD with just over 6 minutes to minutes to go taking a 16-12 lead (and missing on a two point conversion) . After UVA failed to score on their next possession BYU was in good shape to take serious time off the clock. Things were looking good. But UVA intercepted the ball on third down and returned it to the 12. One play later they were in the end zone winning 19-16 LOSS
LSU -4.5 @ TCU – TCU rallied from a 30-14 deficit going into the 4th quarter. Scooping up two LSU fumbles deep in Tiger territory, the Horny Toads trailed 30-27 halfway through the final stanza. LSU then went 75 yards on a kickoff return and finally punching it in to go up 37-27. TCU failed to score on its next drive and LSU never gave the ball back WIN
BYU -1.5 @ Virginia – BYU scored a TD with just over 6 minutes to minutes to go taking a 16-12 lead (and missing on a two point conversion) . After UVA failed to score on their next possession BYU was in good shape to take serious time off the clock. Things were looking good. But UVA intercepted the ball on third down and returned it to the 12. One play later they were in the end zone winning 19-16 LOSS
LSU -4.5 @ TCU – TCU rallied from a 30-14 deficit going into the 4th quarter. Scooping up two LSU fumbles deep in Tiger territory, the Horny Toads trailed 30-27 halfway through the final stanza. LSU then went 75 yards on a kickoff return and finally punching it in to go up 37-27. TCU failed to score on its next drive and LSU never gave the ball back WIN

Northwestern -6.5 @ Cal – Cal lead 24-20. The Cats
then got a pick six to grab a 27-24 lead. Cal then got a FG to tie. A second Cat pick six started an avalanche of purple points as the Cats won 44-30 WIN
Let’s see if I can keep the streak alive with
Week 2 Mega Bets
Oklahoma State -26.5 @ Texas – San Antonio – The Cowboys flashed signs that they might have a defense to go along with their normally high powered offense. If it’s not a mirage then a pesky UTSA team won’t have a chance. After putting up 26 points on Mississippi State – putting up a boatload on the Roadrunners will seem like a piece of Acme Cake. This game has blow out written all over it. The Cowboys are 26-12-1 against the spread since 2010.
then got a pick six to grab a 27-24 lead. Cal then got a FG to tie. A second Cat pick six started an avalanche of purple points as the Cats won 44-30 WIN
Let’s see if I can keep the streak alive with
Week 2 Mega Bets
Oklahoma State -26.5 @ Texas – San Antonio – The Cowboys flashed signs that they might have a defense to go along with their normally high powered offense. If it’s not a mirage then a pesky UTSA team won’t have a chance. After putting up 26 points on Mississippi State – putting up a boatload on the Roadrunners will seem like a piece of Acme Cake. This game has blow out written all over it. The Cowboys are 26-12-1 against the spread since 2010.

Penn State -24.0 vs Eastern Michigan – EMU is just plain awful. They were trailing Howard 24-13 late in the third quarter before pulling the game out. Meanwhile Penn State looked solid in a 23-17 win over Syracuse in the Carrier Dome. They will look even better in their home opener. PSU went 5-1 against the spread as a home favorite last year. The streak continues.
Indianapolis -9.5 vs Oakland – If EMU is awful, Oakland is awfuler. Beyond awful, horrendous. They stink. They stink worse than my feet after a two mile walk on a summer day. Terrelle Pryor can’t throw and when he gets it close to a WR they drop it. The defense is even worse. Andrew Luck is going to have Madden NFL type numbers. Indianapolis will have the spread covered by half time.
And rather than a Point Whore Parlay – this week I’m going with an over/under parlay card with:
UAB @LSU – under 61.5
Atlanta @ New Orleans – over 54.0
Seattle @ Carolina - under 45.0
And for all the picks. times, spreads, results against the spread and more here is the
Indianapolis -9.5 vs Oakland – If EMU is awful, Oakland is awfuler. Beyond awful, horrendous. They stink. They stink worse than my feet after a two mile walk on a summer day. Terrelle Pryor can’t throw and when he gets it close to a WR they drop it. The defense is even worse. Andrew Luck is going to have Madden NFL type numbers. Indianapolis will have the spread covered by half time.
And rather than a Point Whore Parlay – this week I’m going with an over/under parlay card with:
UAB @LSU – under 61.5
Atlanta @ New Orleans – over 54.0
Seattle @ Carolina - under 45.0
And for all the picks. times, spreads, results against the spread and more here is the

2013 Weekly Bettors Guide |
Remember GO JUMBO weekend is Oct 26th at the LVH